Should we get presentable for our husbands?

Happy Monday everyone! 

It has been a few days since I posted on Vintage Feminist due to the holidays and family trip we took this weekend and because of this it has felt as if I am forgetting to do something. Writing on here for the last two months has ALREADY became a habit, but one I love of course and happy to get back to it. 

As I am sitting here next to my nephew and daughter as they fall asleep my dressers mirror is placed right on the opposite wall. So every day there’s usually 30 to 45 minutes of me staring at myself in the mirror. Sounds fun huh? Well you’re right… not in the slightest, but it had me thinking. In the many, vintage housewives books I have read there seems to ALWAYS be a chapter on looking good for your husband. As I look at myself I know instantly I am not one of those girls. I watch two kiddos all day and don’t find the need to wake up and put make up on and sit for an hour doing my hair. My husband never complains. Doesn’t even notice I don’t believe. I have a hard time imagining feeling pressured to get “presentable” for my husband everyday because he expected it. With that said, I CAN imagine doing it for myself. Sometimes as I am sitting in front of the mirror I think just wake up 10 minutes earlier and put make up on. Usually this makes me feel more awake and ready to start my day. Whether this is because I feel like I can jump in the car and run errands at any given moment because I am already ready to go or because it gives me a slight confidence boost. I am not really sure, but every woman goes through those moments of thinking… oh my gosh I can’t look in the mirror another second or I am going to gag… To think women used to make the effort solely to do this for their husbands is crazy. It just sounds exhausting to me. Make ups to expensive to use everyday to use for no reason. 

So I wonder if it was truly EXPECTED of women to do this for their husbands or if it was something that caught on as a norm during those days. Did women have to look presentable for their loved ones?

Now-a-days, I say do it for YOURSELF and only YOURSELF. If you wish to do that every day which is perfectly great and I am jealous of those who have the energy and motivation to do so, but make sure you are doing it to make yourself happy… no one else. Not your husband (even though marriage is a partnership and you should compromise for your other half, but a true man will love you and doesn’t even see such things), not your friends and definitely not your enemies. Be happy being you! 

Does your husband believe you should be presentable when he comes home? Men, do you think women should look a certain way for you to maintain happiness? Lastly, do you put on make up and dress up everyday? What’s your routine? 

Would love to here your opinions!


12 thoughts on “Should we get presentable for our husbands?

  1. Bethany says:

    I very rarely wear makeup. Usually Sunday mornings to church and maybe if we go out on a date. Jordan never complains or asks me to put on makeup or do my hair, but he certainly likes the change of pace when I do my hair and makeup!! I like feeling good and knowing that my husband thinks I look good, but I certainly don’t put on makeup for his approval or because he asks me to

    Liked by 1 person

  2. hopelikehell says:

    My husband has never ever cared a bit if I had makeup on. I know he takes note of the effort and always has something kind to say when I do wear it. Usually, the only time he gets a chance to see it is on the weekends. I do wear it every day now for work but he doesn’t care. I have found that colleagues and students treat me different if I come to work sans a full face of product. But he would never expect a “heels and pearls” kind of presentation if we did get to spend more time together through the week.

    Liked by 1 person

    • VintageFeminist says:

      Same with my husband! Oh interesting! I would love to hear how they treat you differently. Funny you say that, my grandpa is 75 and I wore a athletic headband to work to keep hair out of my eyes and he couldn’t believe I did that. He didn’t say it, but I know he thought it wasn’t dressy enough. I was a dental assistant so I don’t know what he was thinking. lol probably the old-fashion thinking in him.


  3. Nic says:

    There is a phrase we said at my old airline: when you look good, you feel good. I think it’s a great motto to keep in mind. My husband doesn’t expect fresh lipstick and a perfectly ironed dress on me when he’s home, but he does seem to notice when I put a little effort in.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Elizabeth says:

    My husband always says I should wear makeup if it makes me feel better about myself. It’s really sweet because it means he doesn’t think I need it but he supports any effort I make if it’s for my self-esteem.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. campingboatingshawnlee says:

    My husband doesn’t require me to impress him. We both work in the Agricultural business and my customers don’t require it either. Recently I had all but 6 of my teeth removed awaiting dentures 8 weeks later. 6 weeks to go. I asked him how he felt about being married to a toothless woman and he said aren’t all grandmas toothless and grey? He still loves me no matter what. And I love him for that and all kinds of other great attributes he has.

    Liked by 1 person

    • VintageFeminist says:

      That’s so sweet! Thank you for sharing this. And I know how hard the transition to dentures can be as I used to work at a dental office. To many to count appointments. Crazy amounts of money spent. Praying it all goes smoothly and you will love your new teeth 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  6. lisagustavson says:

    This is the first post I’ve read on your blog and so I was particularly aware of your subtitle as I read the article “supporting feminism the old fashioned way”. My husband is French and we spend quite a bit of time in France so I’d like to share the French brand of feminism. French women absolutely put on make-up, do their hair and put on flattering clothing and expect to be treated just as well as they treat themselves… and it appears to work. So I agree with you, do it for yourself! I really didn’t have the energy when my children were little and I have noticed that my husband, who never complained or seemed to notice when I didn’t make an effort, has been treating me like something so much more precious since I started buying myself cute clothes, getting my hair done and wearing make-up again. I love the French brand of feminism: look every bit like a woman and get doted on and romanced while demanding equal treatment at home and in the workplace! It’s a win-win!! I’ve just started my own blog this week about my path as an accidental housewife. I think it will be fun to follow your blog and I hope you’ll follow mine too because we seem to have some common ground!

    Liked by 1 person

    • VintageFeminist says:

      That’s awesome and interesting! That’s my ultimate goal to get it so much together that I can find the energy to do it all. Makeup nice clothes and everything. I will definitely check it out! Thanks so much for the follow and can’t wait to read your stuff 😊

      Liked by 1 person

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